Steve...yep I've been fully accepting of my part in the MR, unfortunately, I've I'm sure gone too far in blaming myself. For me with my W gone, many of the things I could 180 on, while I recognize how I could have done them differently, I can't execute on them. And then the counterpoint to this all is that, if W did not explain to me the sources of her unhappiness with me and/or W simply did not want to be married anymore, no degree of self reflection on my part may have made a single bit of difference.
As you say best we can do is self-reflect, do the best we can with the information we have to improve ourselves and go forward hopefully as a better, more learned partner in our next R. It is just a very challenging proposition when the one person who can really provide to us those areas that contributed to their unhappiness in being with us in an MR are not talking.
