I agree that no matter what you must move forward and live your life. Putting your life on hold while waiting for a wayward spouse is not only unhealthy, it's also not a good strategy as a spouse is more likely to be attracted back if you are out living an interesting life.
Now many of us will find out through this process that our WAS is not all we thought they were and decide that reconciliation is not our goal. I still can't get over Nicole's husband saying he wished their daughter had never been born, and I'm still suspicious about a man who got a green card with his marriage then bails just as his long education is starting to show fruit.
Still the truth is you are nowhere near ready to date at present Nicole so there's no problem with watching and seeing what your H does. But if I were you I wouldn't take him back unless he went to counseling and dated you for a year with total transparency. If you take him back too easily this WILL happen again.
