i knew reason she was being conservative in her interactions with you because she did not want to hurt you... i did this with my H while we were separated... i was not in a place where i could/wanted to re-commit to him, so i believed i had to be very careful...
i think the bonfire is/was a good opportunity for ExW to see you in a different light than as her ExH... i could tell she was seeing you more as friend--which is not bad, because she could eventually come around to see you as more--without confusing you with whom she was married to... she does show signs of interest in that she keeps coming around, and with her comments about "your little girlies," and "tell Mary i said hi,"... i would not have dignified her comment about little girlies with a response... her comment was immature... you don't date little girlies, you date women. (i guess you could have said that :)) and you did well with the "tell Mary," comment by your perplexed look... if anything, you could have said, "but she doesn't know you." that lets exW see that your relationship with Mary did not include exW in any way...
anyway--the negative i see from the conversation was the, "i love you the same," response, because it could show that you still see her as your W... or it could show that you love her in a way that, apparently, was not good enough for her... and it's that comment that makes me think she may cancel... but her "tell Mary," comment leaves me hopeful that she will follow through...
