you stated your boundary, stick to it. Shes getting frustrated you didn't jump at every text. Leave it alone. Let her come to you. Like was said on an earlier post on your thread by JoeJoe.

"She has three choices:

A. Move on from you and stay with OM
B. Move on from OM and stay with you
C. Move on from both of you"

you stated that OM needs to be out of the picture.
Let her choose between the three options.
Option B is your boundary. Enforce it.

M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
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2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds