1) this was a list of reasons why I didnt want or need W back. Some were petty and liveable ( she was untidy- didnt do her share of the house work) and some were game changers (W does not love me and I deserve to be loved- she could just walk out of our M) . I got up to fifty points very quickly (now beyond 80). This helped me see that she wasnt as perfect as I actually thought and she has got faults (quite a lot).
2) this was a list of things that I contributed-to the decay of our M. All the points I came up with are now things for me to improve upon for me and to make me a better person for future R either with W (unlikely) or somebody else. I found that these points also could improve a lot to help build better stronger friendships too.
3) this was a list of positive things I did in the M and the good that I contributed. (Sometimes you need to blow your own trumpet). I realised that I was not the monster she had made me feel like and was able to see that non of my actions or inactions justified her acting this way or leaving and espaecially not for another man.
W is certainly not perfect even before becoming WW I saw my flaws so that I can work on them for myself-to make me a better me. I am not a bad person and actually have very good qualities and traits.
This was just something that helped me.
Really good Idea. Homework for Me! Ill post my results on my thread, thanks RP
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
