Hoping this can be saved, but having doubts 3

[reframe]

Thank OrangeK.

I keep meaning to write and thanks this community for their support, and tell them about my pending divorce, etc.

It's tough to even know if it was really "HOPE" since a lot would need to change for me to want her back.

I told her when we first talked I wanted to go through with the divorce even if we tried to recon, that I "didn't want to be starting that process over again if we dated for a few months and it didn't work out" and that anything we had would be something new, that our marriage was gone.

But, she seemed to be truly accepting responsibility and talking about growing and realizing she'd made a mistake.
It was pretty hard to see her pull back again after that.
I didn't indicate Saturday that her continued involvement with OM was a hard stop, but I did call Sunday and state clearly that I wasn't comfortable with it. The ball is once again in her court, although the presence on dating sites and her going away with him makes it pretty clear what she has chosen.

She may have meant what she wrote at the time, but it's hard to shake the feeling that I just got played.