Shortly before we split-up we were looking to buy a new house and new car. Days before she left she bought plants for our garden.
Now I find out that she was taking out large amounts of cash almost every day for months to hide from me for a future divorce.
What makes it even worse is that it has happened to me before when someone took all of my inhertance from an account using cash machines for weeks whilst my parent had been dying in hospital. That made me depressed for 3 years and I just started feeling better about 6 months ago. W knows how much it hurt me and now she has gone and done the same thing for months. It's even worse now because my W has done it.
Since realising that, I've really struggled the last few days crying when I wake up and several times per day when I think about ending it all. I very nearly called W today to ask her to slow down and not rush into a divorce. It took a lot for me not to do that.
I want us to get back together. If she doesn't even try then I don't see how I can ever even like her as a person.
I am still alone at the family home and my close friends live very far away so I lack any support in person. One friend has been amazing phoning several times per day for as long as I want to talk. W only sees a much better version of me.
