My friend, your W certainly has been through the ringer with her health. I feel for her. But I have been overweight in my lifetime (lost 70 pounds 8 years ago, kept it off) and I think that this is most probably the source of her unhappiness and her reluctance to become a sexual person. She doesn't feel good about herself and it seems that she isn't willing to work at the problem either. Personally, when I don't feel attractive, I do not want to be intimate. I guess I don't understand why a woman at the young age of 38 does not elect to get reconstructive surgery for her breasts. This is of course a very personal choice for a woman, but she is so young and hopefully has a full, long life ahead of her. I don't know what the answer is, but it is difficult for both of you. Perhaps she needs counseling, perhaps she needs to see a doctor. And to be honest, with her history of cancer, being obese is not going to help matters; her chances of recurrence and diabetes is greatly enhanced. You are both young, and I wish you luck. I understand how you feel, but the answer will have to come within her; can you suggest professional help at this point?
