MY TRAGIC WAW STORY PART X

[ItHurts]

Well so be it if I'm in the friend zone. I'm at a point I don't care. There's too much female drama in my life as it is. We went out to eat, stopped and bought her a fish, and then when I went to drop her off at home she asked me to stay and make a fire with her. So I did. I'm not going to go out and waste money to simply have the same conversations "out somewhere." Neither of us are really bar people at all... we're also smokers, so things like going to a bar to drink or the movies aren't our thing...it never was. We both wanted to chill out...not galavant all over town just so I can make it a "date" as defined by every romantic comedy that's ever been made. We made plans at her prompting to meet up and do something. We did dinner and shopping. That's what we did and that sounds like a qualified date to me.
She's not going to miraculously change just because we label it a date. We're spending time together, she keeps coming around and until I or her happened to meet and date other people I see nothing wrong here. It takes time to get to know someone again after a 4 year absence. I'm not shutting myself in a room pining for her...I do my own thing and she does whatever she does.
If I meet someone I want to date then I'll do it. Just like when Mary came back...I didn't restrain myself because of WAW. I'm going to do what I want to do when I feel like it. That includes my romantic life. I'm single and I'm going to enjoy it. If WAW is going to fall for me again then she will...if not that's fine too. I don't much care about inducing these feelings from women. In worry about myself and that's it. They all can do what they want to do. If they want to hang out, great, if not then that's fine too. They always end up coming back to me anyway and that makes me proud. Let them keep chasing me. I have plenty of friends and ladies I can hang with whenever I want and I'm going to enjoy my life without worrying about trying to make a woman feel a certain way. They can feel however they want. Right now I do things that make me happy...and if hanging out with my exes, regardless of how they feel about me, regardless of whether it fit's the definition of a date, is something i enjoy...then I'm doing it. Just as I do things with my guy pals. I worry about maintaining my own happiness and YES...I can most definitely be happy with or without WAW. It's none we're reconnecting and all and who knows where it might lead...but that's the extent of my thought on it. Whatever happens will happen. In the end I will be happy no matter what I'm sure.