She mentioned 2 things when she asked for a D...First, she didn't believe that I truly wanted kids and only was trying to make her happy..Second, she didn't feel like she could be herself..I'm not sure what that meant, because everyone that I talked to, including her best friends, thought she very happy in our marriage and never complained once about anything.. After reading the No More Mr. Nice Guy book, I'm guessing that my part in the downfall of the M would be that I was a Nice Guy...Alot of the things in the book, I did subconsciously without being aware of...Now that I'm aware, I'm working toward bettering that part of myself.. We've now had No Contact for almost a week and everyone is right, it feels so counter-intuitive to what my mind/heart are telling me to do..I just got to have faith that it will help her find her way through the fog...The lows don't seem to be quite as low anymore, no tears, but those memories pop up out of nowhere to remind me of how much I have lost...I still continue on 1 Breathe, 1 step at a time and hope that those memories in the future will instead bring happiness of our experiences rather than PAIN of loss...
