You are right on dating. Its selfish and impatient to date. Plus a disservice to the new woman. I just dont know what to do that works at this point being that we are now separated by 30 minutes. She came to pick up our daughter today and we hung out for about 30 minutes had some laughs. I didnt pursue or push for a hug or anything. I did tell her some of the new neighbors and kids were going to celebrate the 4th outside in the court and she was welcome to join. She didnt seem interested. Im going to stop including her in plans even though DB / DR talks about inviting spouse but not changing anything if they dont come. Part of me wants to just meet halfway to exchange our daughter because it leaves me pretty down after seeing her... or maybe I should man up and be happy / content around her even if i feel sad afterwards?
I guess I just need to find a renewed focus on me: career, GAL activities like workout, play lacrosse, hike, socialize with guy friends (even though must are coupled up). May give it another go with pro lacrosse next year, a team is coming back to Philly near where I live. Ive been working out a lot and am in the best shape Ive been in years. Still playing with college guys once a week and doing very well. It just doesnt seem to matter as much as having a partner to share and experience life with, wanting more kids before my daughter is too old so they can be somewhat close in age...
I dont know how the he*l she acts like she has no feelings its just unbelievable to me. I guess she is better at compartmentalizing things because of issues that went on with her family when she was young... When we were spending time together at her parents a couple months ago and I was just being happy and fun, paying attention to our daughter she was saying stuff like I have less anxiety around you. And she wants to hug. I guess I just need to really work on this being an experience and build my inner strength, self discipline, patience. Sounds good when I write it... but I miss her and the family.
Thanks for the support & advice!
Separated by 30 minutes? That's nothing. I drove 35 minutes 3 times a week to see my in laws before BD. I'm 30 minutes from anything fun or GAL related.
Keep fighting, Did. Keep doing what you need to do!!!!
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
