My wife's midlife crisis

[Rita]

I agree with Marvin and wow, how well-written! My H sent me many announcements of divorce, lawyers, etc., and never followed through. I have friends in my standers community whose H divorced, moved in with another woman and then the marriage was restored 1-2 years after that, some who went through remarriages and even children and the marriage was restored 3-10 years later. (This kind of wait seems to me only possible if you are standing with God's help and understanding marriage through faith, but I suppose it's possible without faith too!) Then there are those who didn't want to wait it out or couldn't for various reasons and didn't have a restored marriage. I liked DnJ's idea of waiting til his youngest was done with high school to move on, and until then just being on his own and healing -- this allowed hope to continue but a projected end point to the pain to be comforting now. And the pain does lessen,it really does. Right now you feel like you will die from the pain, but you won't. You'll get stronger.

Point is, you always have a choice and you should never take anything she says as the last word until she is herself again.

We all know the pain you are feeling, as we have all been there! Sending you a huge hug.