Can I really do this #4

[Dtrmned]

Limbo is the gift of time. I have had that stated to me many times on this board. I very much dislike limbo land, but the alternative at this point is unimaginable. My W doesn't really want to deal with anything at all. A very small issue with my D that we took care of quickly got a response when it was over of "I wish I could just have one day without any drama". Ummm I don't think that is going to happen if we S and eventually D. If that happens, there unfortunately will be much drama ahead! Already just trying to keep myself busy for today. I'll be out in a couple of hours and headed home for the day and tomorrow. Thursday and Friday will be very similar with the work load so I am very nervous. Usually, it is when we are together for long periods of time that for some reason she feels pressured (I'm not saying a word) just by my presence in our home.

I am not following her like a puppy dog or initiating any conversations for small talk. I am truly treating her like a house guest (weird house guest that sleeps in the same bed with me so a little different on that end!).

I don't know how to approach her about doing anything together with the kids for the 4th. Should I ask her? Should I just plan something? I don't really want to go to the party with friends as we have known them all for over a decade and they only know us as a couple and a family. I don't know if she would want to "fake" it through that or what. I just want it to be a good day for our kids and of course would love for all of us to spend the day together. Even if it was just a small bbq in the backyard watching fireworks by ourselves. That would be perfect!

I just don't know.