Walk Away Spouse after 6 yrs - Part 2

[Maika]

Man, what does your W have to do so that you get it through your head that she doesn't want to see you! I feel so sorry for her and for you. Also, taking sweets is tradition is just your bull$hit excuse for pursuit. You don't always have to take sweets unless it's a special occasion. Don't try to sell your garbage to people who don't understand S. Asian traditions. I do and you're just making excuses for your behavior.

[TBSakaJ9]

Dude...it is all pursuit and she wants nothing to do with you but yet you still feel like you have to do it. I think this is the second time she has told you so.

I never showed up at my EW's apartment uninvited. I never randomly showed up. What your doing sounds kind of creepy.

[SteveLW]

Why no sweets this time if it ordinary and custom? Hmmmmmmmm

[Nutcrac]

Maika - Don't act as if you are a king here and know the entire S Asia. How many traditions have you known in S ASia? There are hundreds of Thousands of communities. So stop saying $hit when you are ignorant. Feel free to disagree. And stop calling BS. Excuse for my behavior?? Look at yourself. You are also in a way pursuing by being silent all the while!

Joe - Nothing is creepy about it. I am sure, if I text her she will say No. Like I said again, I am fine if she says No to me. I will walk away.

In fact If she does a TRO or call cops, I would be more happy. That will give a permanent closure. She doesn't want to do that either (sigh)

[TBSakaJ9]

NC - I just don't understand why you keep showing up unannounced wanting to talk or walk or whatever? It is a cheeseless tunnel and you are pushing her farther away.

[Nutcrac]

Why no sweets this time if it ordinary and custom? Hmmmmmmmm

Probably would have taken fruits this time But too soon after first visit.. so ignored!

[Nutcrac]

NC - I just don't understand why you keep showing up unannounced wanting to talk or walk or whatever? It is a cheeseless tunnel and you are pushing her farther away.

Its better that way Joe9. At least we will have a closure. If she wants to push me away forcefully by a TRO or similar, let her be my guest.

[TBSakaJ9]

So you can't get closure by walking in the opposite direction? Are you trying to force her to make a decision?

[Maika]

I will stop acting like a King when you stop acting like a petulant child. I have no idea why you're here when you clearly go against basic DBing principles and keep arguing when you're told by the entire DB community that your approach is now that DB is about. You're completely free to do whatever you want, but why come here and keep arguing instead of listening from people who have more experience than you and have seen it all.

Also, that's a cop out excuse about knowing all traditions in S. Asia. I've had the privilege of travelling extensively in the region and I still call it my home and I have NEVER EVER seen a single community tradition where people bring sweets every SINGLE TIME. You're just making up bull$hit and you know it. Stop hiding behind cultural traditions and own up to your behaviour.

I am in no way pursuing in my sitch. Read up on all my 10 threads to understand my journey. You fail to show basic comprehension of what pursuit/distancer dynamic means, not to mention NC/Dark and all of that.

As I said, why are you here when you clearly don't want to do the DB approach?

[Nutcrac]

So you can't get closure by walking in the opposite direction? Are you trying to force her to make a decision?

yes i cant get a closure that way. She definitely loves me. But her mind is split between wanting to be with me and leaving me. She needs to make a proper decision with this. Either leave me permanently and move on. I dont want to accept each other as just friends and carry on forever. That won't work.