Ive learned that my wife is actively looking for a place to move and may have found one. This is contrary to what we had agreed to previously. After bd, she said that she wanted a divorce and we agrees to work on our communication so that there wouldnt be animosity and we could coparent together. Bunch of hogwash. This is before i found out about the om shes been seeing for the last year m half.
As you may recall we were getting along pretty well for a couple of months and then i noticed a change in her mood. Eventually i found an application with a cover letter to rent a house. At the time i confronted her and she said that she was just looking and wasnt planning to move. Yeah right!!!!
Since then there has been a lot of turmoil and i 100 pct believe my wife is in the throes of a severe mlc. I recently met with an atty and i was told that my youngest son, age 14, is key to a custody arrangement. Basically my kids, d18, s17, s14 have the right to choose who they want to live with. My feeling is that my wife needs urgent help and is unstable to take care of them right now. Ive been doing everything for the last few years. (Part of the problem) While shes been out drinking, crashing her car off the side of the road, not spending anytime with her kids etc.
What im concerned about with her getting ready to move is how she explains this to her parents. She will not move without telling them first. I know that she is going to trash me in that discussion, prob say im acting crazy thinking shes in an affair,,etc. Even though i know she is and have proof. Im thinking i should have a conversation with them first to tell them the truth and maybe they can have better luch getting thru to her. Even though my wife adores and respects her father, im afraid she might buck even more and walk away from everyone.
The other dillema...is it time to have the discussion with the kids? My therapist said that i should tell them the truth but in a respectful way without bashing their mother. And i never would bash her to them. I hope someday she will come out of this. Im just really worried what she will do when everything really hits the fan.
