Bttrfly's advice is so spot on. But, it's also so very hard to really do with the live-in MLCer, I think. As much as I detached, I think I was still peeking peripherally at my ex through laced fingers.
It's so important for us to learn who we are separate from our spouses- from rediscovering old music to discovering new interests. There's not a thing you can do for her so shine that lens on yourself and your kids. Invest in yourself. You'll be happy with the returns.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
