Wife is not who I married...Pls Help Pt 4

[LoneWlf]

S is still hurting very bad. Today I did my morning routine got on the bike early to avoid the heat and had a good ride thru the hills. Took Dog to the dog park made breakfast and went grocery shopping. Washed the car and did garden maintenance. S stayed on his computer with his buddies all day . Near dinner time we both deceided to have dinner at six and I asked S to help bu grating cheese and chopping lettuce - very menial tasks.
I managed to make dinner and when I approached S about his tasks he simply shrugged off and said he forgot. This got me frustrated because I have given him much more than his alloted time along with leniency with his other chores. This has been a common reoccurrence. I proceeded in speaking to him about prioritizing his chores before his online games. Making him aware that he needed to put his family before his friends. With tears now in his eyes he said he uses his computer as an escape to rid his mind of the crappy situation that he is in and that he forgot. What also came out is that when asked to do things with me like riding bikes, hiking , camping , walking trail he says he doesn't want to go because it reminds him of Mom not being there and what family used to be like with all the good times we had. I said this is OUR new family now - it may change in the future but we still must move forward and continue to do things that make us happy. The future is out of our hands lets enjoy the present. Evenmore he cried as he said - I don't even remember what mom looks like because when I went to her place -I was so mad at her that I kept my head down and just nodded as she spoke to me. I held him in my arms and said untill you are able to accept moms choice and rid yourself of the negativity you will not be able to heal and move forward. If you want to continue IC I will set it up. He said he just wants more time. I reiterated that my job is not to punish but to support and guide him to be a independent who will flourish. Please continue to pray for my S - he is having such a rough transition. Thanks!