My wife and I are childhood sweethearts and met in our teens. We have known each other for 25yrs and have been married for 20yrs.;
As soon as my wife hit 40yrs old she quit her job, got herself a new one, had an affair with her boss, claims she is no longer in love with me, claims she has lost attraction, tells me our marriage is boring, rewrote our history, has withdrawn physically, sexually and emotionally; doesn't wish to spend any time with me, seeks significant alone time, shows no incentive to work on our marriage, plans things without me.....the list goes on. The thing that hurts the most is that she doesn't seem to care how I feel.....and never asks.
I am under no doubt that this is a midlife crisis, brought on by bereavement, ill health, serious injury and most of all a lack of fulfilment; the kids are young adults and don't need her like they used to; her immediate family have moved out of the area. She has no hobbies and few interests outside of work;
My wife has told me we should separate so I can go and find someone who will make me happy. I don't believe in divorce or separation. I believe we can work this out if we spent more time together, but she is simply not interested.
I have read an abundance of information on MLC. My path to save my marriage has been rocky to say the least. I started off by doing all the wrong things....until I found this website and Michelle's books.
I am now working on myself, spending quality time with my kids and keeping a low profile; its incredibly tough;
I have no trust, but I can only control myself, nobody else.
This has been going on now for nearly 2years and I am emotionally exhausted; To be ignored on every level, by someone you love and had such an amazing relationship with is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. Of course we had our ups and downs and work, shifts, kids, bills, bereavement, ill health all got in the way, but I never saw this coming at all....its like an alien has taken over my wife!!
My question that nobody can answer, is...."Is there a way back to a loving and intimate relationship with an MLC wife?"
