I respect your points of view on how you see my stitch! But I clearly am in disagreement on many of your views. More damage would have been done, If i ignored her further more. Sorry to say this but it is true. If I had not gone and spoke to her yesterday, she would not have given any thought about extending it. In fact, I was even thinking she might call the cops. That is not what happened.
So are you saying that you don't agree with the DB coach assessment about "both of us not wanting to have divorce"? You are seeing majority of cases here which are mainly the WAW turned WW or something similar. My wife is none of those. Yes she is a WAW. but she is taking her decisions for her moral values and flawed reasoning. She is hurt by me. I have made mistakes and so has she. But a woman's pride is too strong. Its not easy to break the walls and takes time. She definitely knows I read a lot of blogs and forums and thinks the changes in me are mainly due to the internet and not the real ones. I am pretty sure she sees me doing the text book approaches and may be she is entirely aware of this blog or even this thread. Trust me she is very smart! What matters most here is what you really feel from your heart and do it. I don't understand when you guys say 'damage'. I respectfully disagree. A lot of Damage has already been done leaving her alone for a long. Its time to put some efforts to start getting close to her and see how it goes. I can definitely see, she likes the new confident man who is strong to face situation and circumstances. That is all she will get even in her belligerent mode. If she wants to throw me out. Let her throw me out.
Everyone here has a spouse that is leaving based on flawed reasoning! Everyone here as a spouse that questions the positive changes in the LBS. Everyone of us have smart spouses that realizes there are resources like this forum, MWD and her books. Everyone of us thinks that DBing is doing damage when it isn't.
The fact that she didn't throw you out MEANS nothing. She made it very clear that you were not welcome and that she was only treating you as a guest out of obligation. Congratulations, you have a WAS with etiquette. Doesn't help your situation.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
