The beginning of a long and painful journey

[Rawpain]

So W contated me today and said she wants to meet to talk through finances. This has pi55ed me off as I was asking to have this meeting before she left but she left me in the stink and took her wages after she had spent mine and left me in debt. Now she has had a dig that I will be getting the child benefit money and she wont get anything- we agreed this before she left because she did not want the hassle of the paper work and I am on the lower income. I have not said I would not help her with money for the kids. I have already said that I will be paying all the kids childcare costs- this is going to be tight as summer holidays are approaching and my S will need to go into holiday club. I have had to get a loan to pay our credit card and our overdraft off- I had to do this to get her name removed off our account- she is not paying anything towards this. We are only one year into our mortgage and if we sell we will be in debt because we payed more for the house because it was her dream home that she so desperately wanted- but she is still on the mortgage but not paying anything towards it. She does not pay her half of the life insurance to the mortgage.
I think she is going to try and ask for some of the benefit because she is struggling. I noticed she has still been buying lots of new clothes and has just had a holiday. I dont want to be giving her money just so she can have her jollies. I am thinking of saying she can ask me for money when she wants to buy things for the kids- but she has to check with me first and that I will need a copy of the receipt for the purchase. Me being controlling was not an issue in M because W always complained I was to laid back and let her make all the decisions so I dont feel this is an issue of control. Since she left I have really taken control of all my finances and got everything in order and I am just coping. I have not even received any benefit money yet.

Any advice would be welcome. Thanks in advance.