Benito thats some really solid advice and really resonated with me and how I have been looking at it all wrong and lying to myself that I am doing things for me . When in fact it has all had an underlying goal to get a reaction from my W. The part about confidence and not knowing how to speak to my W rang true too and what you said makes so much sense. I need to shake up and wake up and I think seeing my W as dead and this person I have to interact with as just a somebody I know approach will help. I still need to grieve for my W and my R. Thanks.
Hello,
I agree.
We have all been there. We will lie to ourselves constantly to save ourselves pain. The correct path to follow is the most painful one, not the path of least resistance.
Once that pain has been faced (and its fu&&ing painful) it gets less and less until you can cope... and then you start to live again.
But its a common error by new starters to think that because they are going to gym, or GAL more than it is going to end in their partner coming back - like its a magic trick.
The truth is most people do these things with one eye open looking for a reaction.
The fact that you recognize this is a brilliant first step though. well done.
