Tell me more about the body program - what did you learn?
I'm interested because my conversation with my best friend the other day. She was somewhat astonished at something I said about dates thinking I was "all that and a bag of chips" and she said when relationships don't work out she assumes it's because she's not enough. I told her how ridiculous that was (she's a leggy blonde, talented and artistic, self-supporting without debt, looks much younger, brilliant mind, still interested in sex - I told her most guys our age would be thrilled to have her.)
I know her surprised response to my statement was in part because I've gained weight and she's a bit obsessive about her own weight (thin). And it made me think a little about the place I'm in.
I'm certainly not happy with the excess weight I've gained from all the stress of the last two years - I'd like to lose some weight. And I'm far from the skinny body of my youth. But one of the blessings of dating after my divorce is how readily the men I have dated have embraced my body type, regardless of weight. (Picture Botticelli's Venus, with slightly shorter legs, wider hips, and an extra 20 lbs mostly distributed to boobs and behind and you'll get an idea of my current body type.)
I've come to understand that my curves are plenty sexy and if I'm comfortable in my own skin, many men will find me very attractive. With age comes wisdom and frankly my dear, at this age I don't really give a dam. If a man doesn't find me attractive or has concerns about my cellulite, I'll gladly move on to someone who isn't bothered by that.
Although I've dated some very handsome men since my divorce, I'm not critical of THEIR bodies. I kind of expect men in their fifties to have a bit of a belly even if they're very fit, it doesn't bother me that they're not perfect.
My hips are wide and even when I was very skinny in my youth, I always had wide hips - very unfashionable in the 70's when skinny Jordache jeans were the rage. Yet all of the last four men I have dated have made the same comment about enjoying the "view" when walking behind me, so I've finally come to view it as an asset
I guess the point I'm trying to make is, I love and appreciate my body and inhabit it with pride. I don't feel awkward getting naked in front of a new man and they generally respond to my comfort in my skin with appreciation not criticism. I'd rather be with a guy who appreciates me now, and lose weight later, than lose weight now and be with a guy who's not going to be happy if my weight fluctuates back up.
