Need opinions on this. W mentioned moving to another city that we had planned to move to prior. I looked into a position and I have 3 that are interested, 2 sending offer letters. Not a gold mine by any stretch, but I could make it happen. Problem is that the best way to handle it would be for my family to stay and live together. This is just financial as the other city is more expensive 2 households would be just impossible (and of course I wouldn't be paying for that, she would have to pay for her own household).
How do I handle this in a conversation and it would have to happen this week so its not like I could put it off?
You: "If you are serious about wanting to move to another city, I can make that happen".
WW: "I want to get away from this place. What do you mean you can make it happen"?
You: "I have some employers interested in offering me a position. It would be an opportunity to pay off our debts and be able to financially breathe again. However, it would take team effort".
WW: "What do you mean, team effort"?
You: "The purposed salary would not be enough for me to financially support two households. Therefore, we would need to live in the same house".
WW: "Oh, I see. Well, that isn't what I had in mind".
You: "If I stay with this current job, I cannot support two households, and I will not be able to pay off our debts. The financial future looks rather bleak. Moving to a new location, with a higher income would give me a chance to pay off that burden of debt. You have always wanted to live somewhere else, so it could be good for both of us".
WW: "Except, I don't want to continue living with you".
You: "I understand. I am just telling you that I cannot finance another house while living here. I will not be able to finance two homes, if we move.....but I could pay off some major debts by the time D14 heads off to college. The only way it's going to happen is if we are in this together".
WW: "In other words, staying married".
You: "I'm not telling you what to do. I'm telling you that I cannot support two households with the debt we currently have....regardless of where we live. You can think about it. If you are willing to relocate as a family, then I am ready".
WW: "What if I agree to stay in the same house with you, until I get a job, or you pay off the debts"?
What would you say to that question?
Last edited by Cadet; 06/27/1802:03 AM. Reason: Start a new thread message
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
