Does this seem like things are unraveling for her? She was a bit frantic and erratic yesterday, and here are some things i think are wearing on her.
1.) she hasn't started her new training program at work yet for some reason, she was supposed to start in Jan.
2.) She blew up her car's motor and has been driving OM's truck for well over a month now.
3.) She seems to have caused a rift between her mother/stepdad and her. She may not even be living there now.
4.) SIL said she looked tired, and like she was "trying very hard to keep up the act" when she saw WW yesterday.
5.) She is forgetting things like Daycare stuff, items for S3's backpack and whatnot more frequently.
Doesn't really sound like things are "unraveling" for her, it just sounds like she's busy. I think you're focusing way too much on your W and what the tea leaves mean when you should be focusing on your awesome new life.
[quote]
Originally Posted By: OrangeK
WW never replied about the folder or lunchbox.
I messaged MIL.
ME: Did his Lunchbox and School Folder get left at your house? it was not in his bag yesterday and i messaged WW about it and she hasnt answered me. If other people are packing S3's bag for her, they need to know what goes in it.
MIL: They were taken out when he want to FIL's on Saturday as they werent needed, then when she was rushing to get to your brothers house they were overlooked in error. She dropped them off this morning, nobody else packed his school bag. It was Just an oversight.
I Replied to group text with WW and MIL.
ME: Oh, S3 told me that OM had watched him all day while WW was at work, and that he fed him dinner, and that "Mama got me from OM's house and brought me to Aunties" which is fine. So thats why i mentioned someone else packing his bag. Otherwise i dont see why it would have been a problem for me to pick him up at your house, MIL, In (hometown).
Id just like us all to be on the same page in regards to communication and plans for S3, and that we arent ignoring eachother in communications about him. I want this all to run as smoothly as possible. Have a good day.
Your response should have been "OK, thank you." All the rest is not your business. You need to accept that whatever W is doing with S is HER business, YOUR business is what happens when he is with you. As long as he's not in danger it doesn't matter who is taking care of him, that's for W, OM and MIL to work out. Quit trying to inject yourself into the middle of that, that's just going to cause resentment.
I honestly dont care about resentment at this point. She can dislike me all she wants, her happiness or contentment is not my goal. I only care about S3 getting proper treatment. I dont care who cares for him, i even told her i was fine meeting OM for drop offs. OM is part of his life now, i have accepted that. but she is living at OM's house. Which is illegal per our court documents unless she files a change of address.
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
OK, I am still missing the last question she was trying to avoid. I didn't see a question in your group text.
AS is right though, you continue to be passive-aggressive. And that will work against you in the long run. Remember, sweet as punch until you get through the D and custody proceedings.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
OK, I am still missing the last question she was trying to avoid. I didn't see a question in your group text.
AS is right though, you continue to be passive-aggressive. And that will work against you in the long run. Remember, sweet as punch until you get through the D and custody proceedings.
Asking if S3 was at her moms or with OM (S3 said himself he was with OM, it just want some damn honesty about where my son is on a given day)
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
OK, I am still missing the last question she was trying to avoid. I didn't see a question in your group text.
AS is right though, you continue to be passive-aggressive. And that will work against you in the long run. Remember, sweet as punch until you get through the D and custody proceedings.
Asking if S3 was at her moms or with OM (S3 said himself he was with OM, it just want some damn honesty about where my son is on a given day)
You didn't ask. You implied. In a passive aggressive manner.
Try asking directly. Then maybe you will get a direct answer.
ME: Did his Lunchbox and School Folder get left at your house? it was not in his bag yesterday and i messaged WW about it and she hasnt answered me. If other people are packing S3's bag for her, they need to know what goes in it.
MIL: They were taken out when he want to FIL's on Saturday as they werent needed, then when she was rushing to get to your brothers house they were overlooked in error. She dropped them off this morning, nobody else packed his school bag. It was Just an oversight.
I Replied to group text with WW and MIL.
ME: Oh, S3 told me that OM had watched him all day while WW was at work, and that he fed him dinner, and that "Mama got me from OM's house and brought me to Aunties" which is fine. So thats why i mentioned someone else packing his bag. Otherwise i dont see why it would have been a problem for me to pick him up at your house, MIL, In (hometown).
Id just like us all to be on the same page in regards to communication and plans for S3, and that we arent ignoring eachother in communications about him. I want this all to run as smoothly as possible. Have a good day.
WW: I took the stuff out of his bag on Saturday Morning before visiting my Dad. I forgot to put things back in his bag when i stopped at the condo yesterday before rushing to your brothers They are all back at school and his lunchbox if full.
Again, I don't see where you asked that question, only that you let it be known that S3 had told you where he really was. Passive-aggressive.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Ok, I know this is all hard. It is very hard not to respond with emotion. We all know that the fact that OM has access to your S is upsetting you. And if we, on an anonymous message board, know that you know that your WW knows that too. And she exploits it. She knows your son is smart enough to tell you where he really was. She knows that will likely upset you if she tells you a flat out lie or implies to you that he was somewhere he wasn't.
Don't take the bait. I can sense you getting back to a place you were two weeks ago Ok. Deep breaths my friend! We are on your side and am just trying to help you!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
OK - IMO your conversations are way too long. These are not yes or no answers....I think you are making things way too difficult for yourself and I get the sense you are trying to make her look bad, trying to stick it to her, passive aggressive, etc.
When my D's are with their mom I do not ask her where they are at or what they are doing. I trust that as their mom she is watching out for them and will not put them in harms way. They were introduced to my EW's boyfriend last week. Nothing I can do about it, I told her I was disappointed and frustrated she didn't tell me ahead of time but then I dropped it and moved on.
I don't think these long texting dialogues are good for you and your healing process. In the over 1 yr that my W and I have not been together I have never engaged in that type of back and forth dialogue.
Im not going to Kiss her @$$ while she treats me like dirt.
I feel like I dont do a good enough job communicating to you all about how manipulative and antagonistic she is.
Everything she does is in an attempt to get a rise out of me and have me act out and damage my credibility.
MIL is now trying to claim i already Violated the TRO a few weeks ago when i had to meet MIL at her work to drop off S3, and WW and OM showed up while i was still there, she claims that is a violation of TRO. 1.) i measured it and i was 300ft away, so no violation there. 2.) i had a pre arranged meeting with MIL to drop off S3 that day and time. WW is the one that showed up early, where she knew i would be.
M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4 All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18 ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD 2 Major breakups. 2 Rebounds
