Hi Sandi2, thank you for responding. I probably didn't make it clear in my first post that my first W is also my current W...we remarried after being divorced for 10 years, and have now been remarried 3.
I'm in a pretty good place now..I won't say that I've thrown in the towel, but she seems dead set on D. At the same time, she is being very nice to me...bringing me coffee in the mornings, picking up dinner, etc. We actually talked a little last night..although I was trying to steer the conversation clear of the R, I wasn't successful. She said that I'm her best friend, she has deep down love for me, but not intimate love..I did not argue nor try to persuade her otherwise. We currently are living in separate bedrooms, and we come and go as we please...roommate situation. I will be leaving for a 13 day trip starting Monday, I'll be across the country from her. She said when I get back from my trip we should try to get the house ready to sell. Ouch.
It's a very strange situation for me..I have thought that there is an A going on, or another person...and I know in the vast majority of cases there is...but I have no proof, and she isn't all obsessed with her phone or anything. She says she has lost herself, and that the alone time helps her. I know, space and patience. But I can't see her being ready to ditch me without having someone in the on-deck circle..which is what happened in our first D.
I'm hoping that through GAL (i've lost about 15 pounds over the past 6 weeks and am fitter that I have been in a long time) and being away for this trip, something will happen that would give us a starting point. I so want to make it work, but I know all I can do is to take care of me for now.
