Why do you think you are failing? I see you heroically keeping your calm in a complete sh@t-storm of a situation. You are doing a great job, especially under those conditions.

That said, I think the situation might actually be better if/when your H leaves the house. Getting distance from him would be really healthy for you. The less you have to interact with his nastiness the better for your detachment and mental health.

You are doing great. Hang in there.

W 34 Me 42
Married 7 years together 8
0 kids 1 beloved dog
BD 4/6/2018
I moved out 4/7/2018
I moved back in alone 8/05/2018
I file 3/06/2019
D official 5/7/2019