WAW - managing limbo period

[hongaku]

There are a couple of books that focus on the subject of validation that have been useful for me thus far. I Hear You by Michael Sorensen and Connecting Through Yes by Jack Ito. Either or both of these could be potentially useful in learning to have the right perspective on validation and that it does not mean simply agreeing with everything.

You are angry, hurt and feeling betrayed - and rightfully so. But, you also at some level are compelled to reconnect with your W. If you decide that you want to have a new relationship with her, you are going to have to let go of your pain and feelings to an extent, or rather put them aside for the time being. All that matters to her right now are her feelings and probably the kids. You are in her mind the reason she is unhappy.

Re-read DR and I suggest really following the rules put together by sandi2. In fact, I see sandi2 dropping deep wisdom all over this forum and you would be wise to reflect on her advice. That is if you decide you want to have a go at reconciliation with your W...