I think you can ACCEPT a human frailty, or limitation, in your spouse without agreeing to live with it as the status quo. You can look at them objectively and say, Yes I see that they struggle with that and I am sympathetic but I will require of them that they make an effort to get past it.
Here is a non-sex-related example. I love to procrastinate. This drives H crazy. He accepts that this is the way I am, although it doesn't mean that he LIKES it. He has drawn the line at being late for things. I used to make us arrive for church right at the ringing of the bell...no time to spare. This drove him nuts and he firmly set the boundary that this was not acceptable and it must change. And it did! (this was early on in our marriage) Now I am never, ever late.
He did not eliminate the procrastination from me, but he let me know where his boundary was and he has held firm with it. So he accepts that this is naturally my personality but he has set his boundary as far as what he is willing to put up with.
