I know post divorce its hard to find some one to simply date, that us even some what nornal. But what about loving someone?
Obviously it will be hard for many of us to trust someone new. But what does it take to love somebody new? They are not family. You are not raising kids together. You are not dependent on someone. Whats the whole point?
Did you love your ex and a kid together when you met? It took time to build that, right? Did you only love him after getting married and having a kid?
That happened over time. You make your own lives, history and family that includes your son with a guy who loves and respects you and that you love being with.
Last edited by job; 06/07/1811:25 PM. Reason: add link to new thread
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
DonH was replying when the thread locked. Here is his posting:
I really have to chime in here as I don't have bio kids either but even after being D'd for coming up on 12 years now, I am still involved in my step children's lives. Not as much as I once was but I totally love those kids and always have - no difference, from what I can tell, than if they were my own. Some people still find this odd. They almost always are surprised that I still see the kids, still do things with them, etc. I'm like, their mother and I got D'd - not the kids and I. I knew them since they were 7 and 9 and was married to their mom through both of their HS graduations and when it came to college, it was no different, other than I was no longer married. I'd have no problem doing the same with someone else's children. In fact, I think as JuJu said, I could totally love someone else's children - not nearly as sure about another woman.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
