Financially my sitch was very similar to yours. My wife started business but used her personal credit (BAD). So after the business started to fail we had to separate finances to protect our family finances. Also when my daughter was born, we agreed she'd quit her job and stay home fulltime. For a few years things were really tight, so that got me into a habit of really watching our spending.
On BD she said she felt like a child and I was her father when it came to spending. Which was true sometimes I guess, but unless she was going crazy I generally left her spending alone. The only time I would fuss was when I would drop $300 on groceries, and the next day she would go out to eat with my daughter.
Admittedly I needed to lighten up a lot around spending, and I have now.
I totally got the "you make me feel like a kid and you're my dad" talk too. I've done better with it also. At the time, it drove me nuts. Every time she said I treated her like a kid, I just wanted to say "Stop acting like one!", but that wasn't going to do anything but make things worse. I've come a long way since then. Live and learn...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
