Newbie In Need Of Guidance #3

[rminer]

The following evening my W and I went to a concert in a very small venue - approximately 200 people - and then to dinner. I t was probably the best time we heve had together so far. On the way out, I put my hand behind me to lead through the crowd and she took it voluntarily, which is something new. On the way in I gave her a compliment on her appearance and the new dress she bought for the occasion. Her response was not "thank you" or something similar. It was more like she didn't think I was being scincere or was just being nice. Most of the time I give her a compliment this is how she reacts now.

A few days later she asked me if I would go to the store with her to look for some tile. The youngest two kids ended up going too and on the way, my W reached over, took my hand and held it all of the way to the store. On the way home, I reached over and took hers. We ended up for getting something, so we had to run back out and on the way, she again took my hand. This time, out of habit, I kissed it and she smiled. This is something I have always done 90% of the time she holds my hand. On the way back I took hers again. It was kind of comical in a way - each exchanging gestures - but she seemed to like it. We have been in the car together multiple times since and I was waiting to see if she would do it again, but she hasn't. Three days ago we were in the car again, so I took the initiative to take her hand thinking maybe she was waiting for me. I again got a smile.

There have been a few other behavioral changes as well. One time she came home to find me doing my laundry and she apologized for not getting to it. A few days ago I was putting some of my clothes in the wash again. She noticed and insisted that she do it instead of me. I don't mean "Hey, I'll do that for you," I mean she all but pushed me out of the way. I didn't say anything about her not doing it or make a big deal of it either time. I simply started doing it and these are the reactions I received.

She has told me she likes me twice in one form or another. Once I made a joke and she replied "just when I started liking you again" and once I took a drink of her beverage without asking and she said "you're lucky I like you" like she used to do. May not mean anything, but it is new.

My W also seems concerned about how I feel about her too. I proposed an idea that would affect both of us and she shot it down. I wasn't happy about it, but I understood and didn't make a big deal of it. She was concerned that I thought she was being the bad guy and started backtracking on her decision. I told her it was fine and let it go. Two nights ago I came home to find something new in the house, asked where it came from and got a generic answer. Yesterday she felt the need to text me and ask if I was upset about the purchase and explain to me where it came from.

We have a wedding coming up this weekend and she asked me to go clothes shopping with her. While we were out she was asking my opinion on the dresses she was trying on, which I would expect, and she took my advice. The following day she started texting me pictures of the shoes she was looking at asking my opinion, which is something she would normally reserve for our daughters. She never asks my opinion on shoes.

My W also made the comment as we were passing a jewelry counter that she wishes that we should have gotten platinum wedding bands since she likes silver better. She still doesn't wear her wedding rings. Doesn't mean a whole lot, but i found it interesting that she would say it...

She is also being more transparent about things, telling me when she goes out, who she is with and when she will be home. Last week she told me that an ex-boyfriend from high school contacted her (I knew him too, but we were just acquaintances) and they talked for awhile. She also told me the things he was saying to her. I told her that he was hitting on her and she responded that "he was just being sweet and besides, he's married." I again said that he was witting on her, then slipped and said "people don't respect wedding rings anymore." Dead silence. Oops.