Best I can say on my faults is that after our D would go down for the night instead of retiring with my W, Id watch sports or use the computer or work on my car. As we had spent the time while D was up together, I thought I was giving W some needed HER time. Only other fault I can say is that I was not wanting sex all the time.
AnotherStander said it best -- welcome to being human my friend.
Regarding your desire to apologize, I'll let you in on a little secret: that is your brain DESPERATELY trying to find a justification for a little pursuit.
You're hoping that it will open the door to an earnest R talk and you'll be able to make some progress or get W to show even a little emotion.
Most people who go this route are disappointed by the reaction they get, and then they feel even worse.
There may come a time, *once you are detached*, when you *may* want to apologize for some things in order to get closure *for you*. That will be a personal integrity thing, and will be done with *zero* expectations for anything coming out of it, and really no response will be necessary, because it will be for you.
There will be time for this later -- now is not the time.
As far as W giving you the cold shoulder or silent treatment?
Take some advice from Mike Damone:
Mike Damone : I mean don't just walk in. You move across the room. And you don't talk to her. You use your face. You use your body. You use everything. That's what I do. I mean I just send out this vibe and I have personally found that women do respond. I mean, something happens.
Mark Ratner : Well, naturally something happens. I mean, you put the vibe out to 30 million chicks, something is gonna happen.
Mike Damone : That's the idea, Rat. That's the attitude.
Mark Ratner : The attitude?
Mike Damone : Yeah! The attitude dictates that you don't care whether she comes, stays, lays, or prays. I mean whatever happens, your toes are still tappin'. Now when you got that, then you have the attitude.
When W is working hard to ignore you, you give her the attitude -- it doesn't matter what she does or doesn't do, your toes are still tappin'.
(And remember, when it does come time to reconcile or date, when it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.)
Acc
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
