Can I really do this #2

[SteveLW]

So yeah, just make a suggestion. Also, if you got out of the habit of doing things with the family, get back into it.

One of the things I did in Jan. and Feb. was started going to my daughter's HS basketball games with wife and daughter. (My D didn't play this year as a freshman, though she played from 5-8th grade, though the HS coach is working on her to join the team.) At first my W was resistant to it, but as I remain consistent that I was going she finally accepted it, and then embraced it.

So yeah, on a Saturday morning say "we should all go here and do this" and see if she is willing. The nice thing about a suggestion is it gives you wiggle room. If you don't want to go without her, then there is no pressure to. But if you decide you and the kids are still going to go without her then you have that option too.

But the fun is more than just going to do things, it is the conversation you have throughout the day. Text her funny little things that happen at work, or with the kids. No response necessary.

Some of that is slight pursuit, but your sitch has moved to a point where a little pursuit may not hurt. Keep your finger on the pulse, if you see her retreating, then stop doing those things. One of the things I did was I would call her with a non-logistic, fun topic each morning around 10am. Texting works just as well. It got to where she came to expect it. And while initially she was "why are you calling?" afraid I was starting a R discussion, eventually she embraced it and I sometimes I couldn't get her off the phone. (That was a good feeling by the way, after weeks of her not being interested in talking to me.)

That kind of pursuit is not appropriate for most people's sitches, but if she is making you TV watching snacks, it might work in yours.