Also figure out what if anything in your childhood led to you accepting that kind of behavior from your H as normal.
AND OR
Try to see that your xh got you to lower your expectations of him greatly, (while probably increasing his of you.)
HE could not be expected to spend HIS "free" time with family unless HE felt like it...and it was not for you to complain, but to accept his kibbles with gratitude.
Whereas YOU could, of course, make sure all was fine at home so that he could pursue his varied interests, etc. You were the touchstone for him to maintain the veneer of being a family guy while going off when he wanted. And still does, b/c in reality you WILL make sure your son is fine, as you should.
At the end of my m, I now see how little I had come to expect of my x. As if I believed that in time he'd awaken to how loyal and loving I had been -- and reward me.
Ugh...it's embarrassing to me now.
But I relate!
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
