Just want to clarify that while I typed the words "Hatred is closer to love than to apathy" I was stealing that quote from someone that is way more intelligent than I am! OK, like you it hit me as supremely profound when I heard it and it makes a lot of sense.
I honestly forget who it was that said it, may have been MWD, or one of the other dozen marriage and anti-divorce authors I have read since my BD. But the point is that it makes a lot of sense. Love and hate are separated by a fine line. Apathy is the real danger. My W was literally a breath away from complete apathy towards me when I caught her EA and confronted. When she delivered her pronouncement on BD "I don't want to be married anymore" she showed NO emotion at all. None. She wasn't happy, she wasn't sad, she wasn't angry.
She is a very emotional person, so it shows you how close to a complete shutdown she was. I honestly believe if things had gone unchanged for another month she would have been beyond the point of no return in her apathy towards me and MR.
About 3 weeks in I saw her get emotional about everything for the first time. And then she began a slow turnaround from there.
None of this is really relevant to your question, but I wanted to give the background on how profound that statement really is. Love can turn into hate, and you can still fix things. Once hate moves into apathy, it is a very difficult place to return from.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
