Yes, that is exactly it, dealing with a child throwing a tantrum.

I'd schedule the appointment and take him yourself. Make sure to document all of this so that if it comes up in divorce court you are covered. Your W is trying to control you and the situation. Take the bull by the horns and get him in to see the psychologist. If she doesn't come, against the doctor's orders, the so be it. That will look really bad for her.

My only advice for how you could have handled differently is to just have showed up at the Wednesday appointment without saying anything. By saying "see you wednesday" you kind of rubbed her face into your checking up. But that is a small stumble because she might have caught on before that anyway.

Make an appointment, arrange to get your S to it. He is #1 priority at this point. Your W is playing games with your S's mental well-being.

M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018