You said the divorce will be finalized soon, right? I guess you'll find out as the final papers are processed if she has any regrets because the reality of actually being divorced will surely hit your wife whereas all this time it's just been one long detailed process to get to where she wants to be. Her life doesn't sound that great from what you've said. It's not as if she has an amazing boyfriend and she's traveling around the world and living out all her dreams. It sounds like she spends a good amount of time alone.
If you and your wife spent 30 minutes talking over lunch and then another hour after settling the house issue that doesn't sound to me like two people who are about to get divorced. It sounds like two people who are on a date. I'm not sure how often you and your wife did that before you separated?
It's hard to understand the reason for this divorce. It sounds like you've changed a lot for real. If you've changed then why does she still need to divorce you? I hope she's thinking those thoughts but we have no way of reading other people's minds. Perhaps she's content to just be divorced friends, or maybe after divorce she'll finally realize what she's done. The stories about people who divorced and then got back together are alluring.
I just noticed one thing in your signature - your wife appears to be older than you. This is interesting because as a man you could probably find a younger woman in her 30's or 40's whereas your wife at almost 60 might not have so, so many opportunities to date younger men. It just seems so strange for her to let you go. There's no affair on her part. We don't even hear of a MLC. It's not just strange because of age but because you've also been loyal, worked on changing yourself, and you have kids and such a long history together. You and your wife are kind of outliers here on this forum because your reasons for getting divorced don't seem warranted. They just don't seem to be so bad that they can't be fixed in counseling or with better communication. It's just odd. Perhaps I'd have to go back to read your old threads to remember more of her reasons but it really does sound like you've changed.
I wish the whole divorce thing could just be cancelled and you and your wife could start over but I guess it's not helpful to get too optimistic about that just as the divorce is about to happen. It would be nice though to see more signs of regret on your wife's part and effort from her side to take responsibility.
