When my wife told me she didn't want to be married anymore when I confronted her about her EA, she relayed her grand plan to me. She was going to get a job, get an apartment, and get a divorce.
She had this whole fantasy worked out about a quickie online D, I would keep the house, and my daughter would live full time with me. She would float in and out for family activities and dinners. And would still have a key and could help with the dogs and other logistics.
As AS said, it would be all unicorns flying over rainbows pooping skittles.
After my shock wore off and I regained my bearings, and I started to let her go, I started to pop her fantasy bubble. First on the quickie onlind D, I said good luck. We have a child there was no way we would be able to go the online D route. Second, we will sell the house and split the proceeds. This one hit her really hard. She knew that this would affect D14 greatly, since I would likely downsize to smaller property affecting my daughters ability to ride atvs and utvs for recreation, etc.
These two things in particular really started to make the unicorn poop change to real poop. And the rainbows to dissipate. My W started saying things like she didn't want to just stay for financial and logistical reasons. Etc.
If keeping the house is too much, then I would suggest you speak to your W about the fact that you think it will be best to sell the house.That might start to sober her up.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
