Definitely J. I am at a place where I can have any interaction with her without emotion and expectations. But I think I still have some residual anger left over that's kicking around, and I should get rid of it so that I am more at peace.
Little bits of things like - how could she do this to me and the kids; Imma show her up; and her just completely giving up... these things are still hanging around a bit and it doesn't do me any good to allow them any space in my life.
One of my survival skills was to cut people out of my life. Underlying that was anger, self-protection, and not being able to forgive betrayal. This is similar to that. So, me cutting her out of my life has to come from a different motivation rather than the negative emotions. It's just more positive detachment and not being fazed by what she's done. I dunno if I am making any sense lol.
I still believe anger has a purpose in this process, but at some point, it has to be let go. I think I am reaching a point where I've let go most of it, but I need to say farewell to the last pieces. Just need to figure that out in the next little while.
