I keep telling her I will not object if she files, and she has yet, but I fear this breaks the camels back.
Correction, she has not yet filed.
Why do LBH's have this need to continue repeating something they've said to the W? You are chasing after her, and yelling you won't object if she files. She is not listening to your words. She is seeing you chase her.
Look, you have done nothing but watch and persue your W, since the getgo. You've tried doing everything her way, hoping it would persuade her to reconcile........even considering giving up certain custody rights of your other children. You've let her call the shots.......even about letting you stay with her relatives. You will write how she either let you do something or wouldn't let you. And why on earth would you make vacation and summer plans with the kids, that included your W? Why? Whenever we suggest pulling back and detaching, you bring up the summer plans! Do you still think that the more you are together, the better chance you will stand in reconciling? I bet she wanted to engage in those summer activities, didn't she? Why else would she suggest waiting until fall to proceed with the D....or whatever she said.
I have to wonder if you are doing anything to attract your W. As long as you play happy family and try to act as if you are still in a MR with her, I don't think she's going to be interested or feel any need to have more of you for herself. Currently, she has no worries that she'll lose you. She just keeps you dangling and hoping.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
She is not listening to your words. She is seeing you chase her. 