That's always bothered me, but my own therapist says I should let it go and not be controlling by asking her to put the phone down while we're talking
Well, I see this ^^^^as requiring a certain amount of respect during a conversation. But maybe that's just me.
Addiction comes in many forms. The person will turn to their addiction to calm or excite.....it makes no difference.
Quote:
I shouldn't be trying to save my marriage without really focusing on eliminating all behavior of mine that may be emotionally abusive. And that's going to require an apology letter.
Read the book, first.
Does your therapist agree that you have controlling tendencies?
IMHO, you need to see "how" you may have been emotionally abusive. Writing an apology letter won't be worth a pinch of salt if you can't identify "how" you tried to control her. Recognizing what you did and how you did it, is essential in changing. Then, write her an apology letter from that view of knowing and deeply regretting how you treated her.
I hope you will do this as a means of fixing yourself, and hopefully, preventing futher abusive behavior. I believe it is critical to the healing, if there is to ever be a future together.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
