I need to get better about that "apologizing" thing. I tend to be overly apologetic.
Of course, I don't think it's bad to apologize when I do something I feel is wrong. But I definitely need to apologize less.
I tend to worry about hurting feelings. Even if I shouldn't care.
I found out that lately she's been taking our son to the sitter and asking the sitter (who is my neighbor) if I'm "handling everything okay". Of course the sitter tells her that "given the circumstances, it seems that he is".
I don't know if that's good or bad, honestly. She seems to be more concerned about me lately, but I can't tell if she just wants me to be okay or if she's REALLY concerned about my well-being.
She's out of town for a couple more days. I really don't know what to make of everything. It seems like it's starting to change for the positive...but I can't tell for sure. I know it takes time.
In the meantime, I'm trying to have fun on a negative budget. Heh. BUT...at least I've made a few new friends, and overall I've been happier a bit lately. Not completely, of course. I still have my breakdowns.
The other day, before she left town, she stopped by a second time...after I had broken down. She asked if I was okay. I had been fine earlier that morning, I just told her I was having a rough day. I tried not to go into detail.
She hugged me and said she has those days, too.
I don't know. I'm going to keep the positivity going as much as I can. She just kinda caught me at a bad time. Heh.
