Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 13, D busted

[PsySara]

Islam is one of the few (only?) religions that basically outlines the rights of a wife to initiate divorce is necessary. It is very protective over her property and also required child support and even alimony upon divorce. (this was decreed 1400 years ago)

If our divorce is not settled by June 15th then we have to return for a case management hearing where WH would have to explain the hold up. I texted WH this morning and reminded him that June 15th was Eid and it would s*ck if we have to waste a holiday in court. He assured me he submitted the financial affidavit and it should be completed and finalized before June 15th. If that's true then we will be officially divorced by June 15th, I'm crossing my fingers but trying not to rage too much at WH's snail-like pace.

All in all I am vacillating between sadness, apathy, anger, irritation and yearning for this to be done with this process. I'll be honest, I am rather disappointed that I sunk so much into this process and did not bust this divorce. Part of me feels I wasted 2 years on a selfish narcissist when I could already be waaay further along in my healing. I am not sure MWD technique takes into consideration that a lot of walk-aways/MLC/Cheaters are personality disordered and therefore doomed to fail at working on themselves. And let's be honest, if the cheater cannot gain insight then what's the point? They will just fall back on old behaviors and cheat again. Anyone who seeks constant external validation lacks the ability to grow and mature. My WH still pins his cheating on whatever he felt he could not get from me. The fact is there are a lot of unhealthy marriages where both spouses kept sex inside the marriage. As long as WH blames his lack of integrity on me, the chance of cheating is high. Heck, if I burn dinner then he can just go and cheat. If I get hurt/sick/disabled then he can go cheat. I wonder if the majority of DB'ers are simply in denial that they are married to sociopaths. Do we simply enable them by rewarding bad behavior with wonderful spouses? How does that make us safe from the same violation reoccurring?