Count on ups and downs (IV)

[WillDo]

I know she was out with OM last night. I snooped. Shouldnt have. My therapist is really on my side now. He also suggested me not to snoop. He asked how he can trust me. I told him though he shouldnt. But I found other things to focus on. Yes now wrtiting this message but at ease a bit. Read again their conversations deom 4 years back. I think the therapist wanted me to delete those and never mentiin it to my wife. Ok I wont. I would say I feel she has been unfaithful. I read my journal from 4 years back. There are notes that she openly denies an affair. Lies lies everywhere. Last night in her conversation she mentions how she would be in trouble about what she is doing. of course OM engourages the opposite.

God possibly sent the conversations at a better time. Wanted me to accept what is going on. I think I did and hence did the changes but my spirit wouldnt have been able to handle the full extend of the conversations back then.

The affair is out there again and I pray for pafience.