Thanks Steve, I am starting to see the decision to move out might have been the wrong one, and I am sure I haven't been man enough or stood up for myself enough in this situation. I have just bought "No More Mr Nice Guy" which might help me finally man up.

I will remember your advice to stop fixating on the R discussion, it makes a lot of sense to instead, prepare for when the discussion finally happens.

I am finally getting that detachment is key, and praying I'll get better at it sooner rather than later.

Me 46, W 46
D 10, S 13
M 14 years
T 17 years
Bomb 01/18
Moved out (at her request) 01/18
EA Discovered: 02/18

LBH 47 WW 47, M 15 T 18
D 11 S 14
BD, I moved out (duped) Jan 18
3 yr EA with ex-H discovered: Feb 18
I moved back in: Aug 18 (against her wishes)
...No R No M/C, continued limbo, dropping the rope!