Well it's hard to say whether she is well and truly depressed/ suicidal or just being a drama queen to get a reaction out of you. What did the suicide hotline suggest? My suggestion to you is pull back, don't write the letter, don't try to talk about the R. Maybe ask her if she wants to talk to someone and offer to pay for it. If she shuts down on you then don't keep pushing her. If things don't improve or get worse then call that number again.
