New Year, new thinking..

[Coly23]

Hello everyone! It's been a while so I thought I would post a little update. Also I wanted to get your thoughts/advice.

I've been getting on okay. Very busy at work but it keeps me going. D has a boyfriend now so spends a lot of time with him. I am very happy for her and he seems like a lovely young man.

Not much going on with the MLC'er at the moment. Saturday I started to clear out the garage after putting it off for a long time. I was just dreading having to contact H to ask him to collect his stuff. Although, a few weeks ago I was talking with H's friend who said that maybe I should sell all his stuff and keep the money because H wouldn't mind as he would do anything for an easy life! Typical, so I still have to do all the work!!

Anyway, I bit the bullet and texted H yesterday morning and asked if he had an hour to spare to pop over. I didn't tell him why but he came back straight away and said yes he would come over at 3.00pm if that time was okay with me. Anyway before he came over I got busy and sorted a lot of his stuff out. Some of his boxes I couldn't get to so I had to wait for him to come over. When he arrived I don't think he expected me to point to a large pile of his cr&p! I really think he thought I had invited him over for a social get together because he said he didn't have room in his car to take anything as he still has all the stuff I gave him in there from the loft back in February!

Anyway, I gave him a cold drink and he went through some of the bags. He suggested that he put it all back in the garage and will come back next weekend to remove it all. I wasn't happy, but didn't show it. He stayed for a couple of hours in the end and had a cup if tea with me. We did have a really good chat about stuff and a few laughs. It made me miss him even more.

When he comes to pick up his stuff next weekend after that there won't be any reason to see him again. I know that it will upset all me all over again but I'm not afraid to get upset in front of him anymore. However do I say to him that I guess we won't need to see each other anymore or do I just say goodbye and that will be that? I knew this was going to be hard, but I do need to do it because it feels like he is dragging it out because had has nowhere to put his junk not because he wants to remain connected.

This month will be two years since he left. He still has that look of indifference to me and awkwardness. I don't think he misses me but it was strange that he came over not knowing what he was being invited over for!

Happy Monday everyone!