She accused me of being selfish and controlling by sleeping in the master the last few days.
In what world is sleeping in your own bed "selfish". I would argue that perhaps, just maybe, SHE is the one who is selfish given that she's having an affair and wants out of the marriage commitment she made.
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She told me that she knows that I know that she does not want to sleep in the same bed. I basically just validated her feelings, but a couple of times I did start to argue.
I'm all for validating when it's appropriate, but she's a WW not a WAS and you've got to take more of a tough-love approach with her. Just tell her that she is the one that chose to end the M and engage in an affair and if she doesn't want to sleep in the same bed with you then that is HER CHOICE.
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She continued on to say I hate women, or maybe everyone, and that her parents thought that I was trying to do "something" by going back to the master bedroom.
Response: "Now you are just being childish, this conversation is over."
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Again, I can't trust what she says, but it sounds like she is trying to get her parents "on her side".
Of course she is. That's what WW's do. They gather everyone they can to their cause, it makes them feel like their actions are justified. Your response? Conduct yourself with dignity at all times. Ignore her petty accusations, don't engage. Shut her down when she says ridiculous things. Your actions will speak much louder than her words. Expect her parents to side with her, no matter how crazy she gets she is still their daughter. That's just going to happen.
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If her parents really did say this, they are totally ignoring her affair. Her mom told me that if her husband treated her as I treated WW, that she would thrown his stuff out of the house the next day. I am still curious how she would handle him having an affair - and how she thinks I should. I don't think I need to be initiating many convos with them just yet.
No, you need to avoid talking to them about anything except the weather. If they ask about your M just say you're working on things and leave it at that.
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WW also stated that I was trying to "make life hard on her". That isn't true, but I'm not sure how to be a loving husband and take care of her, while she is trying to have her cake and eat it too (with the affair).
She is making life hard on her and everyone else. But she needs to deflect guilt and blame onto someone else, and guess who is the most convenient target. Look forget about being a loving husband right now, you can't do that while she's in an A.
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If she doesn't want to sleep in the master, that is her choice, but I didn't force her to choose that.
EXACTLY!!!
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I think I need to set some boundaries with WW, and tell her "I can't talk about this right now" when it's late and I'm tired. I just think it's too easy to say something I don't want to say.
