Affair discovered

[STH17]

Wow I really appreciate all these responses. I met for a consultation and am glad that I did. Put some of my fears at ease about what a divorce may cost me. The person I talked to sounded pretty confident that I would not even have to pay spousal maintenance. And she reminded me that kids are more important, and I should start my focus there. W may want to live in different state than me about 2 hours away, so that is something that may be difficult to agree on, as I don't want to be that far from my son. I shouldn't just agree to live where she wants to though without sticking up for myself. She says moving would make her happy, but just because she says that now doesn't mean that will last. And I can't let her turn that around on me to say I don't care about her happiness if I don't want to move. Truth is I do care about her happiness, but I can't put hers above mine when she is asking for a divorce. I think that needs to be my mantra as I try to detach.