Thank you Salazar. I do need to clarify that, fortunately, my W wasn't opposed to all physical touching. The only thing she really can't do is kiss me passionately. And while I've talked to a lot of people about this being somewhat normal in couples that have been together for a longtime, I do know that it was something she really enjoyed prior to our current problems. So it something that I hope will eventually return.
But yes, I found another marriage saving expert (not MWD) a while back that had the concept of "touch" charges. Very similar to what you are describing. So putting your hand on her back as you passed behind her. Or giving a rub on the shoulder when you walked past her on the couch. Stuff like that. I instituted those as well as the touching she was open to (hugging, closed mouth kisses, stroking her hair, giving her foot and back massages, cuddling) and I think it all helped in turning the ship around in the intimacy department.
We still have a ways to go but her and I are in so much of a better place all the way around since BD last Dec.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
